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Blogathon Day 28 – I’ll send an SOS to the world

Thank GOD you found me!

I can’t believe I’m writing this, an actual message in a bloody bottle. I feel like Robin whatsherface, from Forest Gump! Anyway, after learning to create fire, building a beacon out of drift wood and even writing ‘help!!!!!!!!!’ in rocks on the beach nothing much surprises me anymore; but not even Tom Hanks (Castaway, not Gump) got this extreme!! And did you SEE his beard?! Wow! Mind you he had Wilson, all I have is Christina Aguilera stuck in my head (alright alright but YOU find a random empty bottle in this situation and I’ll bet you hope there’s a genie in it too!).

Friend, you do not know discomfort till you have worn a skirt made out of palm leaves I assure you; scratchy things! For the love of god, allah, buddah or whomever else… should you ever do it just make sure there aren’t fire ants on your chosen appendage. Failing that make sure you crash land with a load of Fed Ex boxes rather than a peddalo, bikini and packet of margarita mix! Anyway, sorry I’m babbling, haven’t had a decent conversation since I got here and you’re such a good listener!!

Basically, HELP!

Having landed on this island some 4 hours ago I fear I shall never be found. Somewhere south of L’llot, Frank (the peddalo, not some poor tour guide whom I have since eaten) threw a rudder, leaving me to drift aimlessly until we  bumped against this distant shore. This cove seems accessible only from the sea and I am running out of coconuts. The margarita mix was the first to go, turns out you’re supposed to add the tequilla yourself and salt water is NOT an adequate substitute. The packet works well as paper though (I hope you’ll agree).

I should stop writing now, I’m feeling lightheaded and it’s probably lack of blood. I did find a nokia 3310 randomly but it just wouldn’t connect to Virgin, we know who to blame for that!

I shall be scanning the horizon for you, my rescuer. Please hurry, Hanks wasn’t lying about coconut milk!

In desperation


P.S. Phew, had to swim really hard to catch you! Just to let you know, it’s fine, turns out Aguilera wasn’t exactly in my head. I’m currently on a sun lounger with a *proper* margarita. Didn’t want you worrying uneccessarily! And how embarrassing if the navy or something ha…oo.. no…actually I think I really do need rescuing, yes, very stuck. Thanks!

This post is part of the Twitter Blogathon.


About LilMissKaty

Just a normal girl who likes to try new things, go on adventures, spend time with fun people and tell stories...which is how this blog came about really!

8 responses »

  1. That is HILARIOUS! For someone who claimed not to be funny you hit every nail on the head. Poor Frank, I’m sure it wasn’t his fault you were stranded for *SO* long. And bloody Branson. After all his island troubles of late you’d think he’d have sorted connections in case of emergencies… Genious KP!

    • It was ABSOLUTELY Franks fault, lazy toerag!! I have it on good authority that he was in cahoots with that Branson fellow all along. Him and potentially Jose Cuervo…

      It was ever such an ordeal Katy, you have N.O. IDEA! How I survived…I might write a book about my experience. I mean, Katie Price has a magazine…people will literally buy anything!

      • I don’t think a book deal would even scratch the surface… i’m thinking a tv show… 24 style, 1 series for every hour you were there, plus 1 for getting there 1 for getting back. Just to be spiteful: it’ll NEVER been shown on Virgin!!

      • Ooo I like your style!! Haha!!

  2. Pingback: Day 28 – Message in a bottle « twitterblogathon

  3. HAHA!!! How so very random. It’s amazing really that a theme can go in such different direction…but I suppose with these kinds of things they really have the chance to! Wonderful!

    • I was just thinking that as I read the others, yours is SO heartfelt and beautiful while Katy used hers to share memories and awesome stories, was a really good theme for showing the diversity of the three blogateers hey 🙂 Well done Miss P!

  4. Pingback: What are memories if you’ve no one to share them with? | theblogofsense

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